Archive for September, 2010
September 23, 2010 at 1:30 pm · Posted by Tara · Filed under Adoption Blogs, Adult Adoptee, Finding a Voice, Guest Blog
From Guest Blogger Shelise Gieseke. Click here>> for more information on Adoption Mosaic Bloggers.
This past summer marks the end of a truly great resource to the adoption community. The much beloved blog Harlow’s Monkey has been retired. Harlow’s Monkey offered a frank, honest and open point of view on adoption. HM brought a mix of professional and personal experience, as well as a large dose of passion to the table. She fearlessly challenged the status quo and she championed for the kids; always for the kids.
Harlow’s Monkey personally helped this adult adoptee find stability, clarity, and courage amid the emotional storm that is adoption. Harlow’s Monkey was the portal to a community that reflected me and my struggles. The HM blog was one of the first places where I finally felt like there was a place I fit into and a cause worth fighting for. It quickly became the first resource I cited to others exploring the adoption experiences.
Thank you Harlow’s Monkey for inspiring your readers to keep challenging, supporting and championing those of us silenced, forgotten or ignored by the adoption process. Your voice will always be a guiding light, a much-needed critical voice and an inspiration. We will miss you.
September 15, 2010 at 9:08 am · Posted by Tara · Filed under Adoptive Parent, Finding a Voice, Guest Blog, Transracial Adoption
From Guest Blogger Kelly Jeske click here>> for more information on Adoption Mosaic Bloggers.
I’ve wanted to write for Adoption Mosaic’s blog for the past year, but have struggled mightily each time I’ve tried to create a post. As a white, queer mama who adopted (with my partner) a biracial kiddo through open adoption, it’s not as if I have nothing to write about. Still, whenever I sit down to write for the blog, I freeze. I find myself afraid of using my voice; afraid that I won’t be able to transmit my fierce love, longings, passion and critical analysis into typewritten words; afraid that my perspectives will seem naive or offensive. I agonize over how to tell my story without hijacking my daughter’s or her birth mother’s. I’ve owned my story and its telling in many venues, but somehow the blogosphere intimidates me.
Maybe it’s the vast nature of a blog’s audience—I have no idea of who might read my words, of who I am inviting into dialogue. Without the safety of recognition, or the comfort of predictability, sharing becomes more risky. But maybe it becomes even more important. While still requiring vulnerability, sharing ideas with friends and like-minded peers allows for so much shorthand, for shared assumptions and the solid platform of similar perspectives. Writing for a blog, on the other hand, requires that I step outside of safety, that I open myself without the comfort of knowing that I’ll be held in the grace of shared understanding. Read the rest of this entry »
September 5, 2010 at 3:31 pm · Posted by Tara · Filed under Finding a Voice, Introduction, The Adoption Constellation
“I hate this term ‘the triad’”
I don’t remember who said it, but I do remember that we all agreed. This was over 3 years ago. We were 5 women sitting around a dining room table having a board meeting, but also just talking about adoption. The term “the triad” (referring to birth parents, adoptees, and adoptive parents) seems to ignore the whole that is adoption. Extended families, adoption professionals, friends and partners are all left out of the equation as if their lives are not affected by adoption.
For convenience sake, we still use the term to refer to the three specific groups; however, the word feels pointy and divisive. The word evokes an image of three groups standing forever detached from each other. Divided. She didn’t coin the term, but it was Nina who suggested “constellation” as an alternative. Immediately it felt right to us all. Speaking it felt like second nature as we all recognized that we are indeed a part of a greater adoption constellation that reaches far beyond ourselves and our positions in the triad.
When we first imagined creating a magazine, our ambition was to create a magazine that was different than any other adoption-related magazine available. But it soon became apparent that we didn’t just want to BE different. We wanted to MAKE a difference. Read the rest of this entry »
