A young adoptee who lives in Vancouver, Washington is now facing possible deportation to Mexico due to misinformation regarding obtaining citizenship. I wish this was just an isolated incident, but it is not. As I have previously posted, several international adoptees have already been deported to their respective countries due to paperwork oversights. The need for parents to be absolutely certain their children have obtained citizenship can not be overstated.
From guest blogger Shelise Gieseke. We are grateful to Shelise for contributing “Twice Foreign” to Our Voices and to our blog. Click here>> for more information on Adoption Mosaic Bloggers.
Where I reside in Asian-American society, as a Korean adoptee, has been referred to as the “third space.” It is a place that hovers between who I was raised to be and who I was born to be.
I am a Korean adoptee. I was raised in rural Minnesota by white Lutherans of German and Scandinavian descent. Both my parents are generational farmers. My dad and sister have blond hair and blue eyes, as do many of my cousins and friends. I spent a good piece of my life in envy of that blond hair and, especially, those blue eyes. Even though I do not remember a time when I did not know I was adopted from Korea, I do remember a long period of time when I was raised to forget that I was from Korea; to believe that I was the same as everyone else around me, and that everyone else would treat me as if that were true. It seemed to work. . . for a while.
Being familiar with an entire community’s life stories is an advantage and disadvantage of living in a small town. It was an advantage for me because everyone knew how I came to be in my family. I could claim membership to my family with no questions asked. Small town living was a disadvantage because my family and I didn’t have to deal with my race. I could easily become “just like them,” “just a daughter,” “just a friend,” “just a sister,” “just a cousin.” Just, just, just. Even though I was very comfortable with just being “me,” I can see how my affinity for rooting for the underdog, by being moved every time we learned about civil rights in school, by not wanting to eliminate people based on their surface appearance, was me telling myself that I was more than just; I was something other.
In college, I constructed my world to resemble my childhood world. People who would say they saw me as “just” were happily welcome to be a part of my life. I craved others who would accept me as the person I was on the inside and not be guided by my physical appearance. I went on one date with an Asian man, but couldn’t do another because I was convinced I wasn’t Asian enough for him. I didn’t have Asian parents or Asian friends. The whole time we were on our date I was waiting for him to yell, “Phony!” and make me confess I wasn’t a “real” Asian. With my college friends and colleagues, my ethnicity was discussed only within the framework of comedy, as if being the only person of color in a group of white people was always hilarious. I thought this humor helped me own my ethnicity, but it only created more distance between my identity and my ethnicity. Throughout my young adult life, I carried around this sense of being lonely, even in a crowd of people. However, I couldn’t pinpoint the source of this melancholy feeling.
Later in my college career, I transferred to a much larger university. I had the opportunity to take classes specifically related to race, to explore the idea of white privilege and to understand that I no longer had access to this privilege via my family. I started to accept myself as other. However, my social circle remained very white, as I was too afraid of rejection by communities of color. I feared that the people in this community would discard me because my white upbringing made me unauthentic. I only looked like a Korean women, but I thought, talked and walked like a Caucasian.
When I first heard the term “twinkie” to describe a person who was ethnically Asian, but was culturally white (or strived to “act” white), I was so relieved to finally have a label for myself. Even though the person who was describing this term was referring to twinkie as a pejorative term, I was just so happy to learn there was a group of Asians with whom I could identify. But, I did not know where these twinkies were or how to find them. So, I remained in isolation and alone in my struggles.
Then I discovered the online adoptee community. I devoured a handful of blogs that spoke to my race and adoption experiences. I was astonished and relieved to read that other people had experienced many of the same racist encounters that I had; that the authors found it difficult to feel like a “real” member of their ethnic group. Reading these blog entries and comments was the first time I ever felt validation about my own experience as a transracial adoptee. I could read something and say, “I know!” authentically and with authority. A few years later, with help from my therapist and some new friends in the adoption community, I have fully incorporated adoption into my life experience. Where I once thought of adoption as a finite event and something I should “get over,” I now acknowledge that adoption is a lifelong experience that will always be an influence on my life. I can confidently identify as a Korean adoptee. Something I was raised to be, but something different than my birthright.
My current challenge is about authenticity and authority. Given my upbringing, do I know enough about Asian-Americans to claim membership to the group? I know a lot about the culture of rural Minnesotans, but I have never had an Asian-American role model in my everyday life. Do I have the authority to claim to a part of the Asian-American experience based on my physical appearance and the fact that I was born in an Asian country?
I think a lot about what I now believe to be my birthright and how it was taken away from me by many different forces – social, economic, political, religious and individual. Because I am aware of these forces, I am comfortable laying claim to a heritage that was afforded to me by birth, but denied me in my adoptive family. I have not been raised by Korean parents or even lived in a Korean community, but I am living out a piece of the Asian-American experience; an experience that is unique to the Asian-American community itself. Even though it is often downplayed or ignored, I am an Asian immigrant who was sent as a baby to fend for myself in a land of strangers. A land where I could not be comforted by the sound of my language or filled with food cooked by my grandmother’s hand; where I was raised to become a stranger to my own motherland.
I am part of a people that must find the balance between our white families and our needs as Asian-Americans. We have to find acceptance from our white families that we are in fact Asian-Americans and the courage to seek out other Asian-Americans for guidance and support. I am still building courage to seek what I need, but I have been given confidence by my fellow adoptees and by a welcoming Korean-American community. Their acceptance and guidance has slowly been fusing the gap between the person I was raised to be and the person I want to be. And, always, I will hover in the “third space” with my fellow adoptees. We cling to each other as we each try to find our own balance.
In the present social and political climate, this point can not be overstated. International adoptees who do not have their citizenship papers, can be (and have been) deported. It is critical that international adult adoptees have their certificate of citizenship and a valid passport. Adoptive parents of internationally adopted children need to make sure they have applied for, and received, these papers for their children.
Thank you to Resist Racism for illustrating the point so clearly in the following posts:
“According to the Department of State, in 2007 there were 18,748 immigrant visas issued to orphans from the top twenty sending countries. Of these, 5,580 were IR4 visas. Children who arrive on IR4 visas do not receive automatic citizenship. They must complete additional requirements and then file for a change of status.
That means that 5,580 children, or 29.7 percent, from the top twenty sending countries potentially might not receive citizenship through their parents’ errors or omissions. And that’s just for 2007 alone.”
From More Deportations:
“As it stands, there are more than a dozen documented cases of adoptee deportations. In addition, last April the AP documented 55 cases of citizens erroneously deported. Erroneous detentions have spanned time periods ranging from one day to five years.”
“In 2007 alone, more than 5500 children arrived on IR4 visas. This means they will not acquire citizenship until their parents complete additional requirements. That is not counting the children who arrive in the U.S. under “humanitarian parole.” In 2010, more than 800 Haitian children arrived in the U.S. using this temporary permission.
“Humanitarian parole” has never been intended to be used as a path towards citizenship. The USCIS states this on its website”
The Takeaway (national morning news show) interviews Orlando Modeno, a man who lived through the experience of disruption when he was a child. Hear the interview here>>
If there is a silver lining in Artyom’s disruption tragedy, it is that people in the adoption community, and society at large are now talking seriously about, often ignored, adoption issues – the realities of older adoption, disruption, and adoption reform. Some critical points and interesting discussions are taking place on John Raible’s blog.
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The adoption world was shocked and horrified when news of Torry-Ann Hanson’s adoption disruption broke earlier this month. Along with her mother, Nancy Hanson, Torry placed 7 year old Russian adoptee, Artyom Savelyev, on a plane to Russia, accompanied by nothing but a note.
I’m hesitant to draw firm conclusions about this situation until more information surfaces. However, for those of you who are following this case, or have just heard about it here. Following are several links with more information.
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A friend of mine sent me this article published in the online magazine The Root. It is definitely worth the short time it takes to read the entire article. There’s much that I agree with, and some that I don’t, but I think all of it is valuable. The author Angie Chuang writes: “Bring up race and adoption, and watch people squirm.” Are we still squirming when it comes to these conversations? Or have we advanced to a place where we are now much more comfortable talking about race and adoption? Do any of the things the author writes about surprise you? What do you think?
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We are honored to have Guest Blogger Huang Mei-Ling help us launch “Our Voices” a new series featuring stories from adoption community members. Visit Mei-Ling at her blog Shadow Between Two Worlds. For more information about Adoption Mosaic Bloggers click here>> The following is an excerpt from her full story. To read Mei-Ling’s full story click here>>.
Phrasebooks are pretty useful for travel dialogue. Unfortunately, they aren’t exactly loaded with dialogues meant for an adult adoptee who has returned to her birth country.
After watching my siblings tease each other in the front seat for a few minutes, I take another deep breath and try to ask another question, speaking slowly and as clearly as possible. “Women hen kuai hui jia ma?” Will we be returning home soon?
My father glances at me. I wonder what he is thinking of me so far, what he thinks of my pitiful Mandarin and my overall receptiveness while in their midst. I wonder what he thinks of me – his daughter from over twenty years ago. “Hen kuai, dui.” Soon, yes.
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According to this article in The Telegraph, a UK newspaper, many charitable and non-profit organizations are warning against the rush to adopt children from Haiti.
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From Guest Blogger Astrid Dabbeni, Click here>> for more information on Adoption Mosaic Bloggers.
Today a friend on Facebook wrote: “It’s so sad to think about the number of children that have become orphaned in Haiti this week. I pray there’s a good adoption program to help. I am tempted…”
My reply was: “I know this is devastating! I too hope there are good programs. By programs, I mean programs that help the children find and connect with their extended birth family. Very often countries are in basic survival mode when a natural disaster occurs and they don’t search for a child’s extended family before sending them overseas for adoption. Also, people from all over the world are often ‘tempted’ to help at times like this by adopting the children without really understanding the bigger picture of what it REALLY means to adopt a child…let alone from another country. There are SO MANY ways to help…”
I would love to hear what others think about this topic.
The Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute has just released the largest and most comprehensive study on adoptee identity formation ever published. Their 113 page research study Beyond Culture Camp: Promoting Healthy Identity Formation in Adoption was based on 468 surveys of adult adoptees, research analysis, and relevant literature, and includes several recommendations based on their research.
From the Executive Summary:
This ground-breaking study by the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute, to our knowledge, constitutes the largest, most extensive examination of identity development in adopted adults in the U.S. And it does so by asking the experts – adult adoptees – about the experiences, strategies and choices that promote positive identity development. Too often, our understanding of identity, particularly of those adopted across race/ethnicity, has been formed through research only on children and youth. Similarly, conclusions about identity in transracial adoption too often have come from the perspective of parents, not adoptees themselves. The Institute’s study focuses on adult adopted persons, gaining their understanding of how they have integrated “being adopted” and their race/ethnicity with other aspects of themselves that, together, form an identity.
The New York Times reported on the study the day before it’s release, and since then many others have weighed in on blogs, in editorials and articles. What are your thoughts?